Syd The Shopper

Am I crazy for thinking it's a slightly strange phenomenon that my daughter has been given money by me [not that part], and continued on to spend it as she saw fit?

Well.... maybe I am crazy for getting a little emotional about that - it just seems like something of a landmark. What it is really, is that we've been working very hard on the idea that she must earn money for non-essential things that she wants - i.e., dolls, headbands, etc.. We are at a point now where she is finally beginning to graps the concept that the world isn't a free place, and that she must be responsible and within her means when it comes to budgeting.

So ANYWAY, I sent her off to school this morning with $20 for her school's bookfair, and not only did she return with 3 books that she had hand-picked, but she had change. I asked her if she had leftover money, to which she replied,

Yeah, because I didn't want to spend it all. I wanted to save some of it for later! 

Am I a proud mama or what?!

proud of this girl!! 

[Remind me in 10 years when I'm 8 layers deep in prayer that this same daughter will stop spending my money.. haha.. ;) ]

Anyway, we celebrated the day and the onset of the long-awaited weekend with some homemade, healthy-alternative cooking. This one's a favorite in our house, even though this is only the second or third time we've done it. We mainly went for it because of the turkey pepperoni; let's be honest. 

homemade pizza! 

Oh, and that's vegan cheese. Don't shrivel your nose until you've tried it - and remember whose house this came out of ... I mean are any of us really surprised? Haha. 

Sydni shared the spoils of her bookfair with us tonight, which consequently consumed the rest of the evening. I mean,.............

................ STICKERS. 

Stickers. Everywhere. 

my little pony 

That's a wrap, folks. Happy weekend to you & yours!! ♥

xo | cmd

Snowback Thursday

Ok, Ohio.. We get it.

it's.... march. 

This would've been way more fun if it were a weekend. Or, if we as adults had snow days like all the kids do [ahem, Sydniiiiiiiii...]. Instead, I fired up the Subie and joined what small crowd of commuters there was between home and work. It was a slow crawl, but I made it to the office with just enough time to gather up our gear for the job fair Elisa and I were set to attend.

perfect weather for a trek through the work day... haha

We arrived at the job fair without a hitch, despite the flurries!

there's no business like snow business.... 

It was understandably slower than usual, given the inclement weather conditions. Elisa's reaction to the entire experience was equally-understandable.

i feel ya. 

To warm ourselves up after a chilly morning at OHMJ, we took a short drive a few blocks down to Findlay. where the newest installment of Eli's BBQ was up and running. SCORE.

eli's bbq! 

Back at home, it was the standard drill of activity, especially during the cold days... ;)

the pups (: 

just.. typical night.. 

hers & mini hers ;) 

Another good one in the books. G'Nite for now!

xo | cmd

Grown-Up Calamity Days? Nope. :/

Guess who got all dressed up today, and then had nowhere to go?

rub it in.. just ruuuub it in, kiddo.. haha

It was a cold one today. When it's this cold, the kiddos don't go to school. I'm know I'm not the only one who remembers this happening in my childhood just about ... NEVER.

Guess who got to spend a large part of her afternoon traipsing through the remnants of this beautiful weather? [Although said she didn't actually mind it.... ]

i love my job! ♥  

With the snow overflowing out of my wheel wells [& just about everywhere else in the city], I voted for a change of pace for the evening; instead of bundling up, I went a few layers lighter for a quick circuit at the gym with Rob beforewe decided on dinner. The snow had set in heavy by the time we wrapped up at the gym, so at the last minute it was decided that we'd stop somewhere on the way home:

nom nom nom

Phew.
It's still snowing! I imagine this will be fun in the morning, so I'm calling it a night for now.. Be SAFE out there, blogbots!!

xo | cmd

BRAKE For Tuesday ♥

Today was one of those days that flew by at mach speed, but when it ended, I could barely put its contents in the right order.

And it hit me like a brick:

[Thank you, stock photos... haha]

But seriously. Today was the blur of a blur, and my head started spinning without my consent. It was a bad day by any stretch, but I found myself leaning into that natural tendency to feel as though I should start planning and preparing for tomorrow, before today even ended. In some cases, that's needed, but today, no. Today I needed to step back for a moment and recognize the fact that I've got it pretty good. My life's a far cry from perfect, but it's not lacking anything that debilitates me by its absence. I have less than many, yet more than most. There are things I still want, places I want to go, people I long to meet and experiences I dream to have, but if I just..

.... slow...
.... down...
... & just...
........ BE... for a moment or two, I realize that those things are dreams, yes, but the reality is just as beautiful and not worth missing out on.

I can only assume that this is God's way of tugging on my soul to put the brakes on my mind for a moment so that I can realign with every big and small blessing that sits right in my lap as we speak.

So it's Tuesday and I'm... happy. Relaxed, confident and able. :)
I hope you are, too.

xo | cmd

Calming My Heart: The Instagram Way

Something inside me started digging today. It's a culmination of my life at work [which has seen smoother days] and the anticipation of the trip I'm taking in a few short weeks. My mind was restless this morning, unable to focus and stay grounded. I felt like my thoughts were disconnected, scattered and agitated.

It wasn't until I stopped everything and went to Google. I was thankful today for the readily-available plethora of soothing, hipster-printed quotes, verses and adages, aesthetically designed for people going through a moment just like mine this morning. I'm not usually a sucker for posting pre-made artsy renditions of these things, but today it was what my heart needed to re-locate its pace and get me off of the spiritual arrhythmia I was experiencing.

Let me break this down:

When my flustered, bumbling fingers hit the keyboard in search of some small ounce of peace, this is the first thing that popped up:

Oh. Well, okay then.
Deep breaths.. in... and out. Repeat. Now focus, read, download, absorb.

Much of my immediately recent anxiety has been the product of my job. Before I go any further, let me be clear that I absolutely love what I do. I feel that I've been called to do this work, at least for now, and have no intentions of changing gears in that regard. However, just like most jobs, there are patches of turbulence, and it's safe to say that my team and I are in the midst of one of those now. It has been a steady bubble of activity that I have let cloud my resolve and on some days, allow seeds of resentment and bitterness to fester. Try as I may, there are days when my head and heart are exhausted by it all, and I am left to face an 8-hour day without the joy and passion that I know really exist in my work.

^ That showed up on my screen, and the first emotional response I had was guilt.

Guilt. 

I'm not perfect, ya'll. I struggle with forgiveness, maybe not in a long-term capacity, but oftentimes the ability to forgive someone for something within the immediate period of time following what I've deemed an offense... just doesn't exist. I grapple with this a lot, and today I had a heart check that pushed me straight into a prayer. A desperate prayer for forgiveness, and to give forgiveness. I know that when I forgive others, I forgive myself. It's not up to me to decide who is and isn't worthy of truly being forgiven, but it is my responsibility to let go and LET GOD.

^Ok, ok.. I know.. That one's really cliche, I know. BUT, it's true. I had to recalibrate big time this morning. I had to remember that while it seems as though I'm just on repeat most days [while I'm in the moment, at least], the bigger picture has always been, is and will continue to be a reflection of culminating works, actions, responses and growth. It's not just another day, even though this morning was a prime example of me approaching it that way. I was actively pushing back against the stresses of my morning with a malicious spirit, rather than breathing in the fact that I'd done nothing to earn this entirely brand new day I'd been given. I don't have a religion. I have a relationship with the God I love, so what am I so stinkin' concerned about?!

And then I boiled down to the next thing causing ripples. This trip to Panama.
But it's a missions trip, Cori... Why is that a bad thing?!

Well, it's not [a bad thing]. It's not at all. What it is though, is something that takes me out of my comfort zone. It's one of those things in life that presents us with a wide range of response options: fear, resistance, placidity, tolerance, acceptance, embracing..... or any combination of those.

It's funny how something new can elicit a whole bunch of emotional responses that we didn't see coming, and oftentimes [as in my case today] don't even recognize until we're knee [or kneck..] deep in them.

I am always amazed at just how quickly my attitude and energy changes when I intentionally channel my focus into a simple but deliberate chain of positive and encouraging thought. As I processed through each of these things separately this morning, I felt my mood and general approach to it all starting to lighten. I felt more relaxed, less anxious. I felt more patient, less agitated. I felt more receptive to whatever the day [& people in it] had for me, and less dreading of those same things.

I could physically feel my heart slowing. I felt my hands convert from clenched fingers to palms with light fingers. I realized that I was forcefully smashing together the small and big pictures of my life as it currently sits, as opposed to allowing the two to compliment each other and cross paths when it was due. I am preparing for an international mission trip, but I also have a daily mission here at home.. and they're not that different when you strip away the travel, preparation and itinerary: Love God, Love People.. Show Light & Show Hope. I am built [we all are!] to do those things.. so...

^ Send me. Send my soul, my heart & my mind. Locally and internationally. Here I am. Send me.

Just so you know, the rest of my day didn't just magically poof into a smooth sail after my mini meltdown and re-calibration this morning. The events of the last several months and whatever people involved didn't just fall down at my feet to cater to my vision of a well-oiled operation. The grind of activity that is standard daily didn't change. There were a couple of 10-15 minute spans dotted throughout the day that actually highlighted the stresses of what we do. They were there to challenge my resolve. To strengthen my endurance, and teach me a thing or two about patience and grace. No, my day didn't warp into a fairy tale. What changed was my attitude.

I am daily reminded to let go, and let God. Worry doesn't provide any benefit to our bodies or minds, let alone to our souls. It's not fair to sit and stress about what is coming. I'm not saying I don't want to be prepared to handle whatever it is that's coming; I'm not saying that at all. I hope I've not conveyed advocacy of cavalier, reckless and without direction approach to life or circumstance, because that's not what I'm encouraging. What I am saying is that we should work daily, in whatever small ways we can to prepare our hearts and minds so that when life does hand us those things, we can react with grace, endurance and love.

And for myself and any of you out there who find yourselves at the bottom of the barrel in whatever it is, here's this:

Saying that it's never too late actually isn't true. When we're dead, then it's too late, yes. However until then, why do we allow ourselves to believe that change isn't possible? It takes a full commitment, yes, but it's possible. It is possible to reconstruct whatever part of us has been broken. The key is making sure we separate our broken pieces from what it was that broke us in the first place, and be intentional not to use both in the reconstruction.

Whew. Thanks for bearing with me, if you did actually manage all the way through my little mini-sermon. This, as most if not all of my blog entries, was written more for myself than anyone else, but if you were encouraged at all by it, then I am happy all over again. I'll leave it in the universe, with the rest of these entries for the taking :).

That being said, every solid sermon ends with a call to action.

Self, here's yours. Quit sitting around in whatever rut of self-pity has taken over you in whatever situation you're working through. Life is not guaranteed, and every decision you make produces a consequence, be it good or bad.

So..

1. STOP what you're doing & just... BE STILL. 

2. GIVE THANKS & ask for what you need through PRAYER. 

3. GET UP and DO SOMETHING about it :) 

Love, gratitude & honor to you all, blogbots!

xo | cmd

"Ello, March!

Pshhh.. Spring SHOWERS my left foot.

Well, I guess if you consider snow showers to fit into that category, then okay. If not, well then the whole adage is a crock of needing-salt-and-plowing baloney [yes, I'm aware of my spelling]. It's March 1st, and we look like it's still December.

I am so positive, huh?! Haha, I am sorry about that! I mean, it's all true, but let's rewind and talk about something positive instead, because if not.. I probably will stay frumpy about the fact that it's only Spring if this is Alaska right now.

photo cred: pixshark
but seriously..... can we please just... stop snowing?!

It's MARCH. At the END of March, I leave with my team for the mountains of Panama! Today was just a fitting day as ever to drag Rob around with me in search of some things I need to check off the list for this trip. I went at this like I usually do, even though I swear each time that I will never do it this way ever again:

Little to no game plan.

Uh huh. Don't act surprised. This time was actually much closer to 'organized' than some of my previous unscripted missions: I had a solid ballpark idea of what I wanted/needed in my head, which I decided would count for something. The problem with that type of plan though, is that I get easily distracted as it is, so not having any type of blinders system going into this proved a hindrance more than a benefit.

ok so this wasn't me today.
... ok, yes.. it was....

Example:
Thought: "I need waterproof pants."
Reality: "LOOK AT ALL THE WATERPROOF THINGS. BUY. THEM. ALL."

Will I need a waterproof case for my cell phone? Probably not. Do I have one now anyway? Yes.
Did I have small camp towels on my original list? No. Did I buy them anyway, on impulse? Yes.

*Sigh. Poor Rob, too.. haha. I felt a little bit better knowing that he picked up a few things he'd needed as well, but for the most part, I need to once again remind myself that this sort of shotgun-spread shopping has got to be contained next time. It's not like I've never been hiking or camping before... it's just that I have this tendency to overdo it when a new trip is on the horizon.. haha.

REGARDLESS,
the [final month] countdown to Panama is ON! Please, friends & wandering blog eyes, continue to pray for my team and me. Please pray that our nerves and hesitations are dismissed, and that the flexibility we are anxious to believe we possess, will endure throughout the last phase of preparation and throughout the trip itself. My mom reminded me today that Satan will be pushing back against us, and while it might not seem like it now, we'll feel it more and more as we inch closer, and very likely while we're on the trip. That is the one part that doesn't scare me though; I mean come on, it's God we're talking about here... not some measly no-name contender. He's got us :).

photo cred: tumblr
hillsong lyrics: oceans

Happy March, loves!

xo | cmd

Glass & Games

I'm in group-creativity heaven.. haha.

So a month or so back, I'd coordinated with Elisa to have a surprise outing for Carri's birthday; that was this past Thursday. Likewise, I did the same with Carri to plan out a little something for Elisa's birthday, and that was today!

* Sidenote, I am a terrible surprise-keeper. I cannot express how happy I am to not have to constantly monitor what I say between the two of them; keeping ONE secret hushed is a struggle for me.. don't ask me how I managed to keep TWO buttoned up for nearly a month now... haha.

I met Carri at our office, where we were originally going to meet Elisa... plans took a turn when Elisa called saying she'd lost track of time at her apartment [the poor thing was under the weather today and also trying to move out of her apartment this weekend..]. We traveled there to get her, which nearly didn't happen amidst the chaos & stress she had in a move-out deadline. We eventually coerced her into coming with us, and were all grateful that it worked out that way.

Off to Brazee Street Studios we went! For anyone who didn't know about this place - myself included before 4 weeks ago - it's a glass studio that offers material and finished product sale, classes and private events! It's tucked into a little corner on a side street in Oakley, which was clearly off my radar, but is very clearly there now.

We'll be able to pick these projects up next Saturday, once they're double-fired, cooled & whatever else happens to them between now and then. Stay tuned & I'll have the finished products up.. eventually. Hah :)

Glass plate making is taxing work [ok, well...] so afterwards it was a no-brainer that lunch was a priority. We decided to stay close, and settled on Blue Elephant for some Thai food. With our bellies full, we made one final stop at Coffee Emporium.

They day show ended with dropping Elisa back at her house and then stopping at the office to bid adieu to Carri until Monday. I headed back home to catch up with Rob. We lounged around for a bit before a last minute decision to head out to Jessica's for a few hours of winding-down time. I can't imagine if we'd tried to actually go and do anything tonight.

game night with these guys! 

Man, I'm getting old ;)
Oh well..

xo | cmd