Whew, Wednesday.

Here's something that I don't do nearly as often as I should: 

I'm fortunate to have a boss who understands me from a deeper level than daily clusters [& flusters] of activity in the office, and can sit me down in his office with a simple, "what's UP [with you]?"

Wednesdays are a good time to recount my steps taken through the week so far, and in doing so, count the ones moving forward and map out the path to take. I'm perpetually awful at delegating, so too often I find that while I'm still moving in the right direction, I'm slowed by nothing other than my own stubborn refusal to lighten the load and share it with fellow travelers. 

I know; that's a little to deep for just work stuff, but it's true. My job is one shared by many all over the country [& technically in Canada & South Africa as well], and there are days that are, despite our best efforts, prove to be not only thankless, but wholly depleting of any confidence, steam and fragment of sanity we may have had walking into it. BUT THEN, there are the days that come with a mission of triumph, happy coincidences and birthing of new partnerships. Our end goal is to help people, and although some days come to test endurance, character, tenacity and integrity, the others are there to lend reprieve and thank us for the work we do. 

To be honest, today was one of those scattered days that felt as though I was trying to boulder straight up a bar of wet soap. I mean there's really no other way to put it. I drove home in a weird cloud-like state and collapsed into a straight line on the floor as soon as I shed bags and work material. Savasana, talk some sense into me, pleaaaase..... Flow, stretch these muscles and strengthen my brain. God, I give you my frustrations, failures and gratitude and know you are unfailing. Breathe in.. and out. In... Out. Rise... Hold... Rest. REST. For just a moment, just rest. 

true story.

Volleyball was within earshot at 7:15, and came and went in a similar fashion to the day, with a player out and two others standing in, then trading the lineup mid-game - it was just as scattered as the day preceding it had been, but it was OKAY. :) We were there, in the moment, and all was well.

Rob and I jumped into tennis shoes when I got home and went for a walk, a short 2-miles of reset that was much needed for him and for me, both separately and together. 

It turned out to be a beautiful experience, all wrapped up into one, otherwise ordinary Wednesday. 

Happy Wednesday to you and yours, and HEY - Take a moment for yourself this week - whatever it is that you do, and just... BREATHE. It's OKAY.

xo | cmd

Talk To Me, Pinterest

We're leaving for Illinois tomorrow, and today was one of those fast forward days that didn't seem to stop even for a moment. It was an early morning at work, a rapid fire day at work, and then straight to the hour+ roundtrip to get Sydni and come home.

It was one of those days that tested my sanity and showed me that my patience extends further than sometimes I've even been able to believe.

It's days like this when I [and excuse me in advance for how cheesy this is going to sound] find myself clicking through Pinterest to find some additional inspiration. I told you it was cheesy. BUT, it worked, and I thought I'd share some of them with you, my fellow blogbots... in case you're in need of some additional oompf today:

First - get your mind right. If the world is fine, don't reinvent the day by creating your own problems, drama or dischord! The right outlook from us, starts with us.

This one has resonated with me tenfold over the past several months. As patient as I try to be, I've always found root in this principle. As I attended a soccer camp some odd years ago, one of the evening motivational speakers said to us that in her history as a player, the best and most respected players she knew were the ones who very rarely had to vocalize their successes or abilities. They demonstrated it instead, which left impressions far more powerful than just words. I love that. Either BE it or don't, but either way, just DO something and stop telling me all about whether or not you do it, are it, or [insert verb here] it.

More lighthearted on this one. As an adult, I find the struggle here more often than I dismiss it, especially when my plate gets cluttered with the responsibilities of adulthood:work, parenting, bills, social obligations, etc. Thankfully, I have a five-year-old who is constantly reminding me that wonder is an ageless, timeless thing that is essential to our survival - at any stage.

It got crazy today, and in a few select moments, I know that I let the pressure get the best of me. This is a memo to myself, on days like this... in moments like that. Be still, self. Just... listen. 

A reminder to myself that regardless of how the world around me - and those in it - choose to function, adhering to this myself is nobody's responsibility but mine, and it should be one that I actively choose to make each and every single day. Can you imagine if we all made strives for the greatness of glorification of the God who made us, and for each other, rather than for our own often-depraved agendas? #fantasyworld

Lastly, this one. There were several others that seemed so much more cleverly-worded, philosophical, more eloquent, more visually enticing, whatever... but I saw this one and realized that it's the exact opposite of what my human brain wants to do on days like this. It is the exact opposite of what I want to do, but the exact thing I need to do. Amen? Amen.

It's days... like... this.... just breathe. :)

I read those again a few times, and then looked up to my own life here in this moment, right now:

I am home. I am here, present in this moment and proud of the simple little life that I'm blessed to be a part of. Love & light, from us to you.

Happy Thursday!

xo | cmd

BRAKE For Tuesday ♥

Today was one of those days that flew by at mach speed, but when it ended, I could barely put its contents in the right order.

And it hit me like a brick:

[Thank you, stock photos... haha]

But seriously. Today was the blur of a blur, and my head started spinning without my consent. It was a bad day by any stretch, but I found myself leaning into that natural tendency to feel as though I should start planning and preparing for tomorrow, before today even ended. In some cases, that's needed, but today, no. Today I needed to step back for a moment and recognize the fact that I've got it pretty good. My life's a far cry from perfect, but it's not lacking anything that debilitates me by its absence. I have less than many, yet more than most. There are things I still want, places I want to go, people I long to meet and experiences I dream to have, but if I just..

.... slow...
.... down...
... & just...
........ BE... for a moment or two, I realize that those things are dreams, yes, but the reality is just as beautiful and not worth missing out on.

I can only assume that this is God's way of tugging on my soul to put the brakes on my mind for a moment so that I can realign with every big and small blessing that sits right in my lap as we speak.

So it's Tuesday and I'm... happy. Relaxed, confident and able. :)
I hope you are, too.

xo | cmd